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"I never knew that Jesus was knocking on the door of my life and that He wanted me, insignificant me, to know Him personally..."
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One day , someone asked me “Do you know Jesus as your personal saviour?”.This was at a bookstall in the Dandelion Market, where St.Stephens Green shopping centre is now. This bookstall sold Bibles and books of a Christian nature. I had visited this stall some weeks previously and had bought a Bible .I had recently become interested in reading the Bible. I had some discussion with the person who sold it to me but didn’t’ understand what they were saying. I liked discussing religious things. So I decided to go back to the bookstall on this particular Saturday morning to fill in some time before I visited an old folks home with the Vincent De Paul.
On this particular day, the question that I was asked grabbed my attention. I had never met with someone who declared that they really knew Jesus in a personal way and who could say that they were “saved” and had “asked Jesus into their heart”. This was all strange to my ears. As I liked good debate I began to discuss earnestly with this girl.
My initial reaction was to say that “I think I do”. I calculated it up in my head that I as I was religious and did some goods deeds, e.g. I was involved with the St. Vincent De Paul, that I must know him. As we discussed further she explained to me that the Bible says that we all have sinned and are in need of salvation. She furthermore astounded me by saying that salvation could not be earned by our good deeds but it was a gift, and that Jesus died to save me personally i.e. that I needed to be saved. It was “not of works”, she quoted “lest anyone should boast” . It is “by grace” a “free gift” bought by the blood of Jesus. I didn’t like hearing that I was a sinner. Oh I knew that I was a sinner but not that much of a one that I needed to be saved! After all, I was religious and did some good works!
We discussed many issues during the course of the conversation and I debated with her from my own Catholic religious background, being familiar with many aspects of it. But she continued to answer me from the Scriptures and challenged my understanding of Christianity. She challenged me to see that Christians in the bible knew Jesus in a personal way, that He was real to them, that they trusted in Him personally, and that they had assurance of eternal life. They was no “maybe” or “hope to be” saved.
I will always remember the Scripture she quoted, Revelations 3:20 “Behold I stand at the door and knock, if anyone hears my voice and opens the door I will come in.” I never knew that Jesus was knocking on the door of my life and that He wanted me, insignificant me, to know Him personally. She emphasised that tremendous, almost unbelievable truth, that Jesus loved me personally and that He died for me personally.
On that day I was due to visit an old folks home with the Vincent De Paul , so I invited her ,(challenged her!) to come with us to visit and do some good deeds. To my utter amazement she agreed to come! This was to be a turning point in not only my life, but the lives of many others, friends, and families. The impact of this girl, agreeing to come to a St. Vincent De Paul group and visiting the old folks with us, joining with us afterwards to discuss the day’s visitation was far reaching.
I introduced this girl, Jean, to my friends and told them about her faith. We all began to discuss and debate with her for sometime, going over many of the things I had quizzed her on. She continued to answer from the Scriptures and continued to speak of her personal relationship with Jesus and the necessity of inviting Christ into your life and becoming born-again.
In the following week myself and some friends visited her in her flat to discuss these things further. It had gripped our hearts and our thoughts. It was exciting,- could we really know Jesus in such a personal way? And yet, disturbing, -a sense of God calling us, and our responsibility to listen to His call. I can remember lying on my bed at night and sensing Jesus knocking on the door of my life, and I kept making excuses, saying to myself that I am religious , I don’t need this.
Jean invited us to a Gospel Meeting in the Apostolic Church which was held in Pearse St. at the time. Some of us, decided to go. We were very much and impressed with the enthusiastic singing and fervour. We didn’t understand what was preached on that night, we had never heard such preaching before and found it quite amusing!
However one Sunday night soon after, having spoken to Mr.Weir, the Pastor, and his wife, I, and two of my friends asked Jesus into our lives. There was no flashing lights or great feelings for me, unlike my friend Johnny, who was beaming with joy. But I knew that I had obeyed God and was right with Him and that I had started on a journey. It was as if the jig-saw puzzle had fallen into place and that there was a real purpose in life.
When I read the bible afterwards it was like a new book to me. My eyes were opened. I could appreciate it more as I had come to know the God who wrote it.
Shortly after some of my family ,and my friends and likewise some of their families have trusted in Jesus.
I was just gone 19 years old when I asked Jesus into my life. That was a little over 30 years ago.
I am now married to a lovely Christian wife, Bernie, and we have four children.
God has been with me difficulties. He has helped me and continues to help me in my time of need. His promises are unchanging, because He is unchanging. God spoke to me through Psalm 121 when I was a young believer, and I was doubting if I could continue to go on with Him, and said to me “He who keeps you neither slumber or sleeps.”
Life for me, like all of us, has had many ups and downs; difficulties in the work-place, difficulties without a job, good days, bad days, times of joy, times of disappointment, times of blessing , and times of failure; but throughout these God has proven to me , and to my wife, that He is faithful , that he is loving and forgiving and that he will never leave us or forsake us and he continues to be our helper.
Ray McEvoy
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