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I went pretty wild... I became pregnant when I was eighteen... I felt a sense of belonging when for the longest time I had felt so lost...
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My name is Anna Daly and I am a 34-year-old housewife and mother of four.I grew up in a Catholic home along with my three older brothers and twin sister. My mother was the one who took us to mass on a regular basis, my dad rarely attended except maybe at Christmas or Easter. We were quite comfortable financially; my dad had his own engineering business. We were also very close to our extended family, aunts, uncles and cousins. I have some very happy memories of my childhood.
My mom got sick with cancer and died one month after my fifteenth birthday. It was a very traumatic time in my life. When she was sick I sometimes thought about what would happen if she died, and when she did die I thought it was some punishment for me from God for thinking about it. I was very confused and blamed myself. I began to smoke and drink and experiment with drugs. My father was diagnosed with cancer shortly after my mother died and he was in and out of hospital a lot so my sister and I were largely unsupervised. My father passed away a month before my sixteenth birthday.
At that time though I drew further away from God as I knew Him and I had never had a personal relationship with Him only a head knowledge and not a correct one, but I believed that God didn’t like me and I knew I didn’t like myself, I was being punished for being bad and I was bad.
I went pretty wild smoking, drinking, skipping school, dressing weird, boys, parties, nightclubs, smoking dope but I praise God that even though I turned my back on him he never turned away from me.
I became pregnant when I was eighteen and I raised my daughter on my own until she was six, then I met the man who is now my husband, our relationship developed quickly and we moved in together and he became a wonderful father to my little girl and accepted full responsibility for her welfare. Within four years we had another daughter and a son together. It was at this time that one day Brian tuned into a station on the radio by accident and we began to listen. It was a Christian radio station, and over a short period of time something in me began to change. I began to feel convicted about my life style; even though I had told Brian that I never wanted to marry I began to see that it was not good to be living as we were so we decided to get married.
The more I listened to the radio the more I began to hear the name Jesus and the more I heard the name Jesus the more beautiful it sounded to my ears and my desire grew to know more. I tried to read the Bible at this time but I used to feel so sinful when I read. As I listened more I began to hear people talking about Jesus in a very personal way like they really knew Him, and of Jesus performing miracles of healing in peoples lives and as I had believed for years that I was not good enough for God, I learnt that all are sinners and have fallen short of the glory of God, but that forgiveness can be found in Jesus, the only way to God the Father. I heard about the cross and how Jesus had given His life freely. By listening to the radio over the space of a few months I learnt the truth about so many things that I had not known, and excitement began to grow in me that maybe the Jesus that these people spoke of could be my Saviour too.
But through this time I was still smoking and still smoking hash, but one night I cried out to Jesus from my heart, I told Him of my need for Him, I had an emptiness in my life and I believed that it was Jesus I needed. I knew that I was a sinner who badly needed to be made clean. I was weak and could do nothing myself. I couldn’t even give up smoking, a habit that I hated so I asked Jesus to help me. Although I didn’t understand it fully that night I know that the Lord heard my cry and He came into my life. Joy began to grow in my heart.
The following day was a Thursday and I had come home from town and smoked what I now know to be my last cigarette, when I heard a voice speaking so quietly in my head that I was never going to smoke again and it was Jesus revealing Himself to me as my Saviour and He answered my prayer in a powerful way and I never did smoke again. I had no withdrawal symptoms at all which to me was a miracle. I know the Lord works in mysterious ways and He did not take all my bad habits, wrong thinking and ways from me that day, I am still working through some of them with Him and I still have some to yet deal with. I know though that no matter what comes up in my life that I can bring it before my Lord and in Him I can find healing and forgiveness.
After that day joy began to abound in my heart, I felt a sense of belonging when for the longest time I had felt so lost. At times in those early months I felt my heart so full I thought I would burst. I began to read the Bible with joy and I saw my husband and my brother both saved. It was a blessed time for me.
I have since gone through some up and down times but I know my Saviour will never leave me or forsake me and that even the trying times are times of growth, sometimes more so. It is not always easy when the Lord reveals things that need to be changed in my life and I struggle but I know that I am His child and He loves me and disciplines those He loves and I praise Him according to His excellent greatness.
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Ordinary people in Ireland with Real life Experiences with God
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